video killed the radio star

I find focusing on simple movements to be quite serene. It puts me in a near meditative state of mind. The shadow of the trees swaying on a sunny, windy day really caught my eye, and slowed down my state of mind. Likewise the rhythmic scintillation of the reflective construction cones, set off by headlights of cars zooming by on the nearby highway. If you enjoy this kinda thing, you may enjoy my videos. If not, keep it pushing. They will only bore you, it's not for you.



More to come...

Summmmmmmmmmmmmer

(my dog, myself, and friend MF @ the beach).

Can I Hang?

Gooooooooooooooooooood morning. So it's actually not morning at all. 3:29pm in fact. I have to admit, I've always had this love thing going on with summer, but this year I'm trying not to cling to it. I'm enjoying some things about fall's arrival, like being able to sleep in past 2pm (mind you, I didn't get home from work 'til 7:30am) without waking up in a puddle of sweat. The breezy drafts shooting through my house felt great as I fell in and out of sleep, huddled in between masses of blankets and pillows. And the wind's gusty sounds were even more welcome, drowning out the subwoofers and other nonsense that sometimes dominates neighborhood sound waves. Plus, I cleaned out goodwill's back to school everything $2 sale with some faaaaaaaaaaaaabulous sweaters (which I can now wear). So yay fall. I love summer, but I'm learning to explore my options...

But I digress, as I was watching the movie Foxes, I felt overwhelmed to share it with someone. Truth be told I'm only about 10 minutes into it, but I so want to dig through these girls' wardrobes! The hair and makeup is also pretty phenomenal. Cherie Currie's character Annie (or was it Anne?) is my favorite. Style wise anyway. It's not that I want to pass out on barbiturate cocktails and run away from home (can a single 27 y.o. women truly "run away from home" anyway? lol). It's just that if I weren't in love with keeping my curly hair curly, and felt inclined to straighten my hair everyday, and that hairstyle wouldn't look horrible on my face (a lot of if's), that's how I'd wear my hair. I love her style- the mussed feathered hair, the smeared eyeliner, the polyblend print t's, the suspenders, the hobo boots, etc. The girl with glasses has my 2nd favorite look, namely because of said glasses. The girl with the grown out perm-looking hair is my third fav with her nude body suits under high waisted bell bottoms. Jodie Foster's style is my least favorite, but still likable. Anyone else feel like the character's that we are supposed to relate to in movie's often have a slightly boring, subdued style. I totally understand the psychology behind it, but nonetheless, find myself drawn to the supporting roles, curious about their storylines, etc.

My brain is still waking up, excuse the clusterfuckness of this blog, but if you've read my blog before, you know how it goes.

<3 Happy fall.

Random photos + random thoughts.

^Some pics I took.

While my tribal art coffee wears off, I thought I would post a blog. I feel too alert to fall asleep, but not alert enough to tackle academic endeavors (reading, studying, essay writing, etc.) or correspondence. But I'm alert enough to blog. Maybe this says something about blogging. Hmmm.

On my ride home a loud talker dominated the entire space of the bus with his boisterous sound waves. So loud and thunderous was his voice, that my poor little shuffle, cranked on full blast couldn't compete. I HAD to hear his idiotic, uninformed views the whole way home. If you want to know what he was thinking, just imagine someone who fits the hood rat stereotype to the T, and you can imagine the self-loathing, internalized racism built, misogynistic, ignorant bullshit he was spewing. But really, it's besides the point.

Last week, I observed this guy talking AT this other guy. When loud talker got off, the other guy approached me, asking if I had heard the conversation. He wanted to know if I believed what loud talker was saying. He proceeded to tell me how it seemed like loud talker was making a bunch of stuff up, and talked shit about him the remainder of the ride.

Today, I saw them again. Same routine. After hearing loud talkers B.S. for a half hour, the listener again approached me. I made a joke in reference to last week, and it flew right over his head. He made a highly offensive remark. I could write a dissertation on all the ways he was wrong for just that one remark, that one sentence. I thought about it. I had a lot of options. I could tear him a new one, for one thing. But then I thought- Why? Why bother? He proved himself to be ignorant (in the truest sense of the word) and dim witted. I simply moved away from him.

Off the bus, on my bike ride home, his statement popped into my head, and I felt myself getting angry all over again. I had to stop and ask WHY yet again. WHY am I letting this tool into my mental and emotional space? Of what significance is he to me? What's to be gained of ruminating over such utter garbage? Nothing.

And now, friends, the caffeine has worn of. End "rant" (?)

Good night.

Let's procrastinate for a Minute

In the computer lab.

Frustrated.

Tired.

Grumpy.

Craving junk food.

I was just looking at some guy, noticing how he looked like MJ. From his still Black f. soul glow days. Sooooo similar to MJ in the face, from his pre-surgery days. Stature almost identical. And the jherri curl. I was just looking at dude, wondering if he knew he had jherri curl, or if he just thought that he had moisturized curls.

I break from my staring to type away aqui, and I hear a voice say, softly, what sounds like "I like your hair". The voice actually SOUNDS like MJ. I wait a beat before turning around, and casually look around, like I'm just looking around, in case he isn't talking to me. It's pretty embarrassing blurting out "Thanks" only to realize it was someone else being complimented. He seemed to be looking at me, so I just smile at him and say "thanks" even more softly, that way if he wasn't talking to me, he didn't know that I said thanks, but if he was, he could just assume that I said thanks.

I felt like an asshole, because I was JUST lightweight making fun of him in my head.

But I guess he's among the brave few, to bring things back before anyone else will go there. Expect to see more jherri curl. Especially amongst the fashionably clad. I think things are going that way.

The website for my hybrid math class isn't working...and I feel too stressed to think. Let's look at some pics of one of my favorite style icons. Shall we?

Actually, I posted them at the beginning. Idis Apfel, isn't she lovely? I WANT those glasses. Her style represents everything fashion should be- fun, eclectic, eccentric, and most importantly, not entirely reliant on $. Think about it, the most innovative people, style wise, are the poorest- the homeless and immigrants. The fashions walking down the runways of New York, Milan, London, Paris, Tokyo, etc. are largely adaptations of what the financially impaired are wearing.

My brain is mush right now.

I just hope that today goes without event. I want to run, eat, walk my dog (she's in surgery right now :( ? Idk if she will be up to walking tonight?), and go to sleep. Nothing more, nothing less.

"White" huh?

So my sister has been wanting me to do something with my thumbnails scattered all over her desktop (small photos on her computer, that is, not actual nails, that's disgusting. I suppose now is as good a time as any to make the public service announcement that nail clipping should ONLY be done in the confines of your own home and immediately thrown away. I'm appalled at the frequency in which I must endure the clip-clop nail chopping on the bus and metro. YUCK!). So I'm finally going to post this photos so I can delete them.

I originally had an in depth essay in mind, but it's hot and I feel lethargic, so this shall be more of a photo blog today.

So I've always thought Jessica Biel looked mixed. Her bio mentions her being various white ethnicities as well as part Chocktaw Indian. But I don't buy it. Coming across an old photo of her only confirmed my instinct.



Below, a more recent photo. She somehow (hmm) looks less "ethnic", but I still see it.



And what about Elizabeth Berekley AKA "Jessie" from saved by the Bell. She is simply described as white or sometimes Jewish...



Or "white" Taylor Dayne? (First photo more recent. Like Jessica, She became less ethnic looking over time)



And by now we all now about "Italian" Vinn Diesel:


If I recall, for years Mariah Carey tried to shrug off her Black ancestry before finally stepping outta her multi-racial closet, telling journalists that she has an Afro-Venezualan father and White mother, and later penning a song about being mixed.


Is it just me or do all of the aforementioned look almost as Black/mixed (or the same or even moreso) than the following outspokenly (or at least admittedly, for some) Black mixed folks?

Wentworth Miller



Zoe Bonet



Maya Rudolph



Jurnee Smollet



Adriana Lima



Thandie Newton



Philip Lynott



Kid Sister



Leona Lewis



Jennifer Beals




Blue Cantrell



Amil



If you disagree, factor in skin tone changes (both incidental and intentional), hair color changes, perms, hair lenghth, etc. I think that their are so many part Black celebrities out there who won't claim it. Wtf?! Even if my mixie radar is off (and it's usually very on point) in these cases, I know there are so many others out there...

Quitting is not an option

Let's not beat a dead horse here by saying that I'm broke. Being such, I decided to opt out of cross country this season (to focus on finances). It wasn't a huge sacrifice as my body really was never meant for xc. Being relatively short means tall girls automatically get a few extra inches per stride (which over the course of a 5k turns into feet, yards, etc.). Being muscular means that my body has a heavy load to carry. You really can't power through 3.2 miles. It's a game of efficiency and endurance (the latter, I possess, the former, by default, I am not).

I did the cowardly thing, and called my coach on her office phone (which I know she never answers) instead of her cell to inform her that I need to concentrate on making and saving money this summer and won't be doing cross country. This woman scares me. She's not the type to flip out. Those people are actually way less scary to me than the ice queens/kings of the world. She is ice queen extraordinaire. A simple "hmph" or "oh" from her, and you know exactly where she stands. Her silences are even more uncomfortable, and she will cut you with her looks. It's weird to think that she's less than a decade older than me, but that she installs so much fear. I feel 7 around her! HAHAHAHA!

The day after I left the message with her, I receive a vm from her, telling me to start picking up the tempo on 35 minute runs, and do stairs 2 days this week. Um, what? She knows that I'm not doing xc, right? She further informs me that she'll call next week and tell me what to do. I KNOW she got my message. I think she's choosing to ignore it.

Apparently, quitting is NOT an option. I am on the cross country team, like it or not. It's somehow actually quite endearing.